Stuff & Nonsense #1180

-> I don’t care, I don’t mind
-> I don’t know, I don’t know
-> Torn reborn the cries of our dismay
-> Are nothin’ to the wind but whose to mind
I don’t care, I don’t mind

As a general rule, if you’re going to be a journalist, best to learn some of the basic skills first…one would be to read information properly and comprehend it before reporting or commenting. (It’s those old-fashioned principles that just won’t die).

… to any sensate being not dependent for a living on the same mainstream media, one of the defining issues of modern Scotland is our failing media – up to including the mighty BBC.

… I’m sure Nicola Sturgeon does believe in the role of a free press, whatever that means in a Britain where a handful of tax-dodging billionaires control most of it, but I’m equally sure she understands she can’t win either. By sidelining the media, if that were somehow possible, she merely antagonises them and it’s generally true that she herself gets a good press because even the partisans can’t find enough to taint her with… But overwhelmingly I’m sure she understands that the ham-fisted vitriol and Unionist cheerleading hasn’t changed the mind of a single Scottish voter. No matter how many ‘SNP failure’ think pieces David writes – and I’m anticipating a slew of Tory revival articles before next May – not a tiny fissure has appeared in the voting patterns. The truly humiliating fact for the celebrating hacks to swallow is that no one actually cares what they write – insofar as giving up on the Nats is concerned. It’s a living but it’s of limited consequence. Far from inspiring writing, the media gives us instead the whine of the loser. And a bad loser at that…

Derek Bateman

I don’t know, I don’t know

When you live next door to a sewage plant, your nose eventually gives up and no longer smells the crap. You can walk out into your garden and the only odour you’ll detect is the sweet smell of the flower on a thistle. That’s what’s happened in Scotland with our Unionist media and their constant deluge of SNPcrap. We no longer smell it. We’ve given up caring. Scotland no longer pays any heed to those who fancy themselves as opinion makers, because what ordinary Scots learned during the independence referendum was that we are perfectly capable of forming our own opinions and we need the opinion formers of the Unionist press like we need bog roll made from sandpaper.

The three ply sandpaper isn’t best pleased by the discovery that it’s being left on the shelf by the news shoppers. It clearly isn’t the fault of their product, which comes with the seal of approval of the British establishment. Purveyors of sandpaper based lavatorial cleansing products get awarded knighthoods and OBEs and are granted interviews with really important politicians – you know, the ones who don’t live in Scotland. This is clearly a testament to the utility and product worthiness of an arse scraped raw. So the fact that this award winning product is being rejected by the punters can only be because they have been seduced by an alien cult which tells them stupid idiocies like they can wipe their behinds with something soft. The very idea.

The Unionist media doesn’t understand why its message has lost traction and continues to lose traction. It prefers to console itself with the familiar nostrums that it’s all because the SNP is bad. This makes the Scottish Unionist media the only media on the planet which reports the story of the boy who cried wolf as being all the fault of the wolf.

… Scotland deserves better. Scotland deserves a media that actually reflects the breadth and variety of opinions in this country.


Torn reborn the cries of our dismay

Are nothin’ to the wind but whose to mind

… Gardham’s pique at people daring to accurately anticipate and appropriately mock the media’s coverage is revealing.

Before the referendum, Scotland’s media essentially answered to nobody. Journalists were – and are – professionally scrutinised by no-one, yet in addition to the platform of their own newspapers are given free rein as commentators and pundits on air, never to be challenged or questioned. (Simon Johnson of the Telegraph, for example, at no point had to explain his actions over “Memogate” in public.)

Since the rise of the new media, many have reacted with fury and indignation to being held to account in the way they conduct themselves. As sites like Wings and others reveal mistruths and distortions day after day, hacks lash out with a level of venom that appears in inverse proportion to their papers’ plummetting sales figures.

The half of the Scottish population that’s almost totally unrepresented on newsagents’ shelves (except when it’s being insulted as a bunch of unthinking brainwashed cultist drones, of course) simply doesn’t listen to the likes of Magnus Gardham any more. He and his ilk, ironically, have infantilised journalism by reducing it to gossip and smears and hysterical hyperbole about things people say on Twitter.

So often have the press cried “Wolf!” over stories which crumbled to nothing under the slightest examination (for examples, stick a pin in just about any page of this site’s “media” category over the last four years) that millions of Scots now react to their latest screaming banner headlines with a mixture of contempt, amusement and pity.

The more Gardham and his colleagues circle the wagons and bay their rage at the ungrateful public, the less credible they become. If they want their “scrutiny” of the Scottish Government to be respected, readers may feel they perhaps ought to give some consideration to greatly increasing the quality of it. Because at the moment, it’s being treated with the exact amount of dignity that it deserves.

Rev. Stuart Campbell


– > Patti Smith | Boy Cried Wolf


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